Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Definitely Not Tomorrow

It's becoming a familiar refrain..."maybe tomorrow." But after hearing it so many times, I just don't believe it anymore. I can tell you just from Holland's numbers so far today, that we won't be going home tomorrow. Her sat is hovering between 90-92 during the day with no oxygen cannula. It quickly drops to 86-89 when she is sleeping. Today she has a snotty nose, which she didn't have before. I know it could be the pneumonia working it's way out, but I'm afraid that she has picked up something else. The whole hospital wing is filled with coughing, snotty nosed kids. Holland is in NO WAY content to stay in her room. She wants to be out playing and touching everything in typical two-year-old fashion. She wants to play with the other kids. I can only do so much in keeping her sanitized and away from germs, but I am becoming more and more paranoid the longer we are here. I just don't want her picking up another bug!

Eden saw the pediatrician on Saturday, and again this morning. She is pretty miserable. She has an ear infection, some pneumonia, and reactive airway (wheezing, bronchial inflamation). She has been on antibiotics and Albuterol treatments every 3-5 hours for 4 days, and today was prescribed an oral steroid. Her oxygen saturation was 97 in the office, so no hospitalization needed for now. The doctor wants her seen again before the weekend because she has been eating and drinking next to nothing and is at risk for dehydration. If anything, that is what she'll end up in the hospital for.

I feel so down and discouraged. Both girls have had such a huge setback. I feel like we've lost at least 6 months of progress in eating, gaining weight, and motor skills, as well as any sense of "normalcy" that we might have been feeling for the past couple of months. It's been a big wake up, reminder, kick in the pants, that Holland and Eden will never outgrow the effects of their extreme prematurity.

With all of the recent commotion in our lives, we haven't been able to adequately focus on our fundraising efforts. John and I still plan on walking for the March of Dimes WalkAmerica next weekend, even if we have to do it without our sweeties. If nothing else, this recent bout of illness and the setbacks that have come along with it, are a reminder of what an important cause this is. Please show your support for Team Holland and Eden by helping us to reach our goal!


Sarah Furlough said...

Billie, I wish I could give you hug and a break, I know you are in desperate need! I can sense your frustration, and I can only tell you that your girls will remain in my prayers.

I will pray that Eden gets stronger and can avoid a hospital stay, and that Holly will soon be home bringing you all smiles.

LoneWolfArcher said...

Normalcy will come again. In a few months you will be able to look back on this and be thankful that our country has such a great medical system. Your family will remain in my prayers until all are healthy once again.

Anonymous said...

I can't even begin to imagine how discouraged you must feel, but try to remeber how quick they can bounce back!! It may seem like they will never get past these setbacks, but think how far they've come. They progress and amaze us more and more each year. When I look back at those early pictures it is so hard to believe that much time has passed, and those itsy bitsy babies are the gtown up girlies we see today! We love all you guys, let us know if you need anything. Luv Liz & Eric

Kristin said...

Sorry to hear the girls aren't feeling better yet. Big hugs to all of you and we will be praying that the girls can kick these bugs in the pants and get back on track soon.

Anonymous said...

Sorry to read you're having such a hard time of it. Hugs to you and the girls. I hope they both feel better soon. My son had pneumonia when he was 8 weeks old and we had to spend 3 days in the hospital. That was hard enough so I can't imagine doing it now that he is two. I agree with Liz, they'll bounce back quickly!

abby said...


I'm so sorry that the girls are not getting better more quickly. We're also hoping that Eden's sats stay up there and her pneumonia passes without incident and that Holland gets strong quickly so that she can get the heck out of the germ factory.

Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your sweeties.

Anonymous said...

Wow, I am so sorry to hear all this. The idea that the very fact of being in the hospital might be prolonging Holland's hospital stay would be enough to drive me crazy. I hope that you are proven wrong about losing six months of progress and that the girlies bounce back once they start feeling better. And that they start feeling better soon!

Casey's trio said...

I am so sorry to hear that you are still in the hospital with Holland...and will be praying that she comes home soon and that Eden is able to fight off her bug. I can only imagine how frustrated and tired you all must be...hope you can get back to your normal lives soon.

God bless,

Kim said...

Thinking of you and praying for Holland and Eden. Like everyone else has said, I hope that once they are feeling better, they can bounce back, put on the weight they have lost, and go back to doing all the stuff they were doing pre-illness. I'd give you a hug and pour you a glass of Merlot if I could!